My friend came to my place the other day because she had a tiff with her boyf. The usual things girls do, she complained about him. and then I agree with her and so on.

But as she was sharing, I was reminded of my own relationship. And I really appreciate her because I was reminded that I should be contented with what I have and cherish them. We all know this but who actually does that.

I'm sorry friend, cause she's like so sad but I felt fortunate at that time. I started to think about my relationship and I thought this is what I have and I can only maintain it and improve it with my strength because I believe, when you are sincere, others can feel it. Be it relationship with boyf, family and/or friends.

So the thing is, relationship is mutual. You need to trust, believe and support what the other party do. Even if you don't understand his/her actions, you need to trust that everything they do has reasons behind it. I realised that it is rather difficult to express your feelings totally to the other party. Therefore, a lot of people experience in communication barriers.

So how? when a couple is lack of communication? Then it need to be build on trust, understanding and mutual feelings. Every individual is different. They got different upbringing, grow up in different environments, different life experiences and many more other factors. Hence, when you meet a new person, you need to learn him/her in a new way no matter how experience you were.

As I grow older, I realised I don't really like to share my stuff especially emotions. It has become natural part of me to hide my feelings. And a lot of times, I have uncertainties but I choose not to clarify. Because I believe ignorant is a bliss. I refused to know the ugly truth because the truth always don't result good. So I had people asking me, "so you rather people lie to you?" Actually, to a certain extent yes. If truth hurts, I rather live in ignorant because I'll be happier this way. But after going through so much in life, I can already accept almost anything. Just that I'm too tired to care much.

I came a long way and I know I don't need some sweet romantic relationship because I'm am too tired to do that kind of stupid stuff that I did when I was young. I have no energy to quarrel as well. I only want a peaceful and dependable relationship. No need a lot of ups and downs. No need a lot of interesting stuff. As long as I feel comfortable.

Somebody told me, I'm not that kind of girl that my boyf would like. I know. hahaha! But many a times, reality is always what you think you want it to be. I have friends who got stumbled as well. Came to ask me why choose him? ok, not that he's not good. Just that, he's not that kind of guy I will like. But I'm still very sure he is what I want.

When I start to recall back the times when we just get to know each other, I think we were so much happier. Its always the best time when you don't understand the person well. We seem to reach the bottleneck and don't really know how to communicate with each other after some time. I'm trying my best to understand you more. Seriously, I don't really care what people tell me. Even though sometimes, I get really disappointed by your actions but I still choose to believe in you and thats why I didn't probe much about your stuff.

I'm sorry for the things I did that annoyed you which I may not know and I really appreciate you for all these while that you're here.

Thank you Baby, I love you.

I'm so sorry!

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My blog have been dead since i became an idler.

hahaha.

and many has bugged me to update, update and update.

-

Seriously, I don't know where should I start man.

Like so long never blog alot of things happen leh.

how...?

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Start from friday then.

So fridays are as usual for vocal lessons.

After class, we went Singapore Flyer to watch/support Sherlyn's performance.

at this bitro bar.

There were reporters there I think. They were interviewing her.

hahaha.

hmm.. quite cool.

I left shortly after as my evil baby came to fetch me and we went bq.

Waited for Andy and partner to reach and dinner.

We headed to Shebang.

as usual, drank a little, sing a little, played cards a little.

Afterthat, Adrian came down, supper and home.

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This is a tiring day!

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Sat.. Woke up at 12 plus.

Headed to Bedok int for lunch with baby and Char

and down to Brenda's house for cookie baking.

The cookies are delicious and beautiful!

Until 6+ at night.

We then head down to Clarke quay to meet ... that don't know what name.

Sat at riverside... chilled for few hours and then to Long John for dinner.

Accompanied Char to take bus as my "shi jian duo de shi"...

hhahahah.

Then met baby at bq.

We went to Shebang again.

with Andy, Adrian, Robin, Ray and partner.

As usual, drank a little, sang a little, played cards a little.

Then supper at Adrian's house downstairs.

Ate halfway suddenly got storm and rained heavily.

And there was volcano that was about to erupt.

hahaha.

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Sun .. First meal of the day.. Ma La Steamboat at bugis.

Then went to chinatown as Adrian had a $10000 deal and need to go sign contract.

While baby went to the mst popular $6 saloon to cut his ShowLuo's hair.

hahaha!

After all's done, headed to Lunar.

Drinks sucked. Live band sucked.

Old songs all the way.

Still got shang hai tan.

Service is the worse.

Can you imagine all the ah tiongs there.

And what? Y2 will be the this week.

Like! WTH. Why this place?!!!

And the 2 lead singer talk alot of nonsense!

Catched Angels and Demon after that.

hmmm.. actually I was super tired and.... I dozed off.

oops.

its too comfortable leh.

awwww...

and reached home at 430AM.

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AHHHH. I want to sleep now!!!!~

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The end.

Yes, blog is to let people read.
and my friends have been asking me how come I don't blog so often.

because, i'm lazy to post about my daily routine.
and don't wish so loud everyday.

Well, since people are keen to know...

ahwu is a special man.
He is one who i don't know how to decribe.
one who i never really seen before.
one who is sincere and genuine than anyone else.
one knows my heart.
one who brings out my laughter again.
one who cured my insomnia.
one who care for me.
one who loves me.

ahwu is my boyfriend
and i so appreciate him.

i love you, baby.

我没有期待什么
我没有奢望什么
只是单纯的喜欢

I did not write it here delibrately to let people read.
I just want you to know that I have no other intentions.
not at all. not anything.

I really wanted to move on.
But again, its not what I can control.
Though I thought I could.

I just cannot imagine myself doing such a stupid thing at this stage!
I could choose among so many and why did I even choose to like the most common person on street I can ever know?

If you know me long enough, I am probably the most practicle person you will ever know when comes to relationship. its just so not me.

My decision is i'm not gonna control my feelings in whatever ways.
but I will not try to do anything to go after you.

I get to know Him few years back and I fell in love with Him. But time and time again I just couldn't commit in this relationship. And hence, I left Him and went back to Him for many times. But after that, I realised I still want to go back to Him. He is that kind of life i want to lead, I made a decision and went back to Him. Life became more meaningful and purposeful. I begin to be very optimistic and always believe in myself and Him.

Initially, everything was smooth and good. I was able to do the unexpected and amazing things for Him. I thought this time. I am able to stay with Him for good. But, since don't know when, I find Him too good for me that I don't deserve His goodness.

A leopard can't change its spots. A tiger can't change its hunting nature. And I can never change for good. Its just me and my nature. I tried so hard to pull myself up. but end up, I realise I can't. I tried many times but i still failed. It start to feel really lousy staying with Him. It feels terrible facing Him. I think and I thought. I ask myself what I want? My answer is Him. But, my conscience says you can't. you can't do it. To continue to remain stagnant like this, I feel even lousier. Hence, I made this decision to give up on Him. Give up is never a word i will use. But is never a word i like to use. Excuses are not what i would use.

But deep in my heart there are just stuffs I can't put down. It really hurts to make this decision. And it hurts to leave the one i love. I seriously can't bear to leave Him. To me, giving up on Him is like giving up on everything. because I won't have faith to pursue the things I like. I won't have someone to rely on. I won't have strength to persist on. I won't be able to believe in myself like before. Somehow, I know along the way I may regret this decision but a promise to myself since the day i went back to Him. This would be the last chance. If I still choose to leave, I will never go back to Him again. Even if it doesn't pleases Him. I don't want to take Him for granted. No matter what happen in future, its my decision. Even if i have to bear the worse consequence, I'm prepared for it and i deserve it.

Its actually not that complicated but because of my pride, my selfishness, my self centeredness. I complicate stuffs. I make things difficult for myself. Even if one day I am able to put down this bearer, I will not go back to Him anymore. and this is the last promise out of myself again. Although it is really silly.

I am sorry.

我超开心 !!!!!

哈哈哈哈哈

woohoo~

seeyou!!!

wahahaha!
I bought like 6 items from that girlsshop!
Their stuffs are ... OMG!!
But aww.. there is a few tops which i love so much have been sold out!!!
hahaha!
I'm sure you've checked that earlier than me right?

Why am I posting this.
Because I'm so motivated on gf's post.
Well, although it was nothing much but
it just kind of showed me some things.
Well, I thank God
for giving me a big heart for love and acceptance.
for speaking straight into my heart.
Showing me the difference between saint and world.

To Accept doesn't mean to Agree.

In life, we meet different kinds of people. Most of them are probably passers and few can be true friends. How do you wish others to treat you? Is it the way you treat others?
What are the things you look for at first sight? How judgmental are you?
Sometimes, we need some kind of chemistry between friends. But what happens when there is no chemistry? Do you outcast the person?
Self-centredness is when you stand very strong in your principles and not being able to accept others. Having strong personality is good but becareful not to be obstinate.

I'm not very old but throughout the years, I have met many weird people. I learnt to accept them for who they are but without agreeing with the things I know that are not right. By accepting them, it trained my social skills, patience and all that it takes. I began to learn so much from the process of communicating. Acceptance does matter in the success of your life!

You never know how much you can hurt someone by rejecting them
You never know the impact that you can make in one's life by accepting them
in little details.
Acceptance helps you to grow
To accept not agree

Tiffany & Betty
Pretty monitress & Gullible

Tiffany & Yikang
Miss Nice & 闷骚

Royston & Betty
Thick Skin & Adorable

Ashton & Regina
伟大的老师 & 村姑

Alicia & Shyrlyn
Paranoid & Crazy

全家福哦!

Ashton & Alicia
Man! what an expression

Ashton & Tiffany

Regina!
可爱路线

Tiffany & Peter
唱将 & 李圣杰

Rose among the thorns

Ladies, oops.

haha. ok, I just love doing crazy stuff

Peter, Royston & Yikang 色伯伯

Celebrated my birthday today! ok its darn happening but a little disorganized.

We started of with ice breaker. We played murderer. I believe everyone enjoyed yea? hahha

Next was praise and worship, we sang All Things New and I Surrender All.

Then we had a testimony time shared by yours truely. Those who missed the part, this is what i shared.

Hi friends, today is a very important day for me because I’m celebrating my 17^th birthday. Firstly, I want to take this opportunity to thank God for this day. For some of you here who know me for quite awhile, you guys would know a bit of my past. For those who do not know, I was a very rebellious kid since young. In my teenage years, it got bad to worse. I mixed with the wrong company that led me to smoking, fights, taking drugs and shoplifting at the age of 13. I was blacklisted in school and was popular for sitting in the general office. In those days, the police are also the frequent people I meet.

I got into many troubles and in the year 2005 I was charged. I was sent to Girls’ Home for a month and 15 months of probation. Nevertheless, my heart was with that group of friends even after I came out from Girls’ Home. Hence, I got into more troubles that year. In January last year, I was charged again. This time I was remanded in Girls’ Home for a month and sentenced 18 months on probation. I really want to thank God because of the very very rare cases that can be placed on probation for the second time.

When I was in Girls’ Home, I prayed day and night and I felt so strongly that God was with me all the time. So when I heard that I’m able to go through probation again, I made a decision to change and desired to lead a better life. I quit all my bad habits at once and left the group of friends. During last year’s Easter, I came back to church and decided to plant myself here. I’m very grateful to God because He changed my life tremendously. He gave me a purpose in life and a passion to pursue my dream in singing. After experiencing all this, I really do not regret of such a past. I believe my experience can be of help to the people around me.

Friends, if a person like me can dream big dreams, I believe all of can. I really want to encourage all of you that if you have a dream, do not be afraid to pursue it. There may be a lot of challenges but your passion will keep you going. I also learnt to keep a positive attitude in facing every challenge. My experience had helped me to grow in maturity and I had grown to know who Jesus is. Without Him, I won’t be able to turn myself from my past and would never have the courage to pursue my dream.

Lastly, I want to thank all my cell group members especially Marlin and Seth who was always there in times of need. Without you guys, my life would not be filled with so much joy and laughter. I also want to thank all of you who spend your time to come here. I really appreciate your presence. I have also prepared a little card for all of you. Hope you enjoy yourselves today!!!

Thank you.

Followed by collecting God's offering.

Continued with birthday sabo! seriously, not very exciting. hahaha oops!! sorry!

and lastly KTV-ing! hahaha! get to listen to all the pro!! ahaha

If God had a name, what would it be
And would you call it to His face
If you were faced with Him in all his glory
What would you ask if you had just one question

And yeah yeah God is great
yeah yeah God is good
yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

What if God was one of us
Just a slob like one of us
Just a stranger on the bus
Trying to make his way home

If God had a face what would it look like
And would you want to see
If seeing meant that you would have to believe
In things like heaven and in Jesus and the saints and all the prophets

And yeah yeah God is great
yeah yeah God is good
yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

What if God was one of us
Just a slob like one of us
Just a stranger on the bus
Trying to make His way home
He's trying to make His way home

And yeah yeah God is great
yeah yeah God is good
yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

What if God was one of us
Just a slob like one of us
Just a stranger on the bus
Trying to make His way home
Just trying to make His way home
Back up to heaven all alone
Nobody calling on the phone
Except for the pope maybe in Rome

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As required from Queena: They're my friends!

Seth's scary finger! OMG! Its turning black now.

Best mummy retard face award!! hahaha

I really wonder what she's doing.

mummy-daughter retard face!

I roar! she don't seemed to be afraid. hahaha!

Nicole said we have same face, do we?

I think we should get best partners ok! always spoiling pictures! hahah!

Shepherd and sheep. She's our magical goddess! hahhahah!