Today.
is the day.

I'm finally 18!!!
wahahahahha!

Happy Birthday to me.

Every year, when it reach my birthday.
I will say.. oh man.
Time past really fast.
Its alr half a year gone...

After my birthday, its another half year for '09 to end.
no more wasting time.
Time to plan again.

But today is the day!
I'm looking forward for tonight.
What will i become!
wahahahha!

放弃是懦夫所为
我没想过放弃
只是我完全找不到推动力
而我也不知道从何时失去了这份热忱
这份热爱唱歌的热忱
我不想参加比赛

其实自从我决定离开他前，我已经知道会有这一天
我知道一切会便
当身边的人看到这些变化，当然就会觉得我便很多
从始至中我都没有对我做的决定后悔过
最多只是觉得亏欠他吧
但至少我现在比较轻松，比较快了
不会像以前好想让很多东西限制一样

可能你们会觉得我便很多
甚至是变坏
但我只想说你们认识我那段时间是我改过自新的时候
即使我怎样告诉你们我在那时之前是怎样的，你们也不会了解
我经历过的挫折和点点滴滴
是你们永远都不会体会到的
我不想用这个来做借口
我也不想显得很自我

I totally understand all your kind intentions
but i seriously find it fake because you all only say it when somebody older initiate.
and weird because if you don't agree with me from the beginning,
why didn't you mention it earlier
and make it seemed like you all are so ok with it?
my change is not a just thing.
didn't it happened long ago.
or rather few months back?
I appreciate the things you guys say and really wanting me to change.
but seriously, I have toned down alot.
I don't see why you guys didn't say a thing
when I club and drink almost every night
and only say it now?
and yes, if you knew I smoke long ago, why didn't you say on the spot.
yes, comparing to you all, I'm bad, rebellious 0r
whatsoever.
comparing myself now from the past.
I'm normal.

afterall you all just like to make remark without understanding the whole picture.
and for that person who actually understand most of the picture.
I'm so disappointed in you.

Lastly, I want to emphasize
I'm not posting this because I'm angry of the things you all say.
Its why people follow crowd.
Its why wait until now?

Moreover, my change may be drastic to you guys
because you have not seen the real me.
there is alot of thing you guys can debate with me
like, why was i able to change for the better that time
but I don't wish to explain stuffs from other realm to you guys.
because you have to experience it before you understand it.

Afterall, I'm happy whith what I have now and I'm contented

On Sunday, met baby and char for dinner at bugis.

So nice of baby to come from his work place which is at kallang.. all the way to my home which is at bt batok to fetch me for dinner just because i tell him i'm hungry. He's great.

After dinner, baby have to rush back to work.

so left char and i. we sit there crap abit then head to shop for baby's clothes. and I bought him 2 T from Praise, 1 Polo and Long sleeve from Topman. Price is reasonable. Then char and i began to crap again. until baby knock off.

We went around looking for AndyLWL & gf because that Hotel 81 is so established that there re too many of them and we don't know where are they.

Finally found them, head down to Cine as they are going for movie.

Char, baby and I then went to bt timah.. expecting some place to chill but ended up at the prata place again. But now I know.. Liquids Cafe! hahaha.

As usual, crap abit and went home.

It was a horrible night because i only fell asleep at like 5am.

Its like the old feeling and the old noises that made me think of so many things when my heart finally softens. When I realised and ask them to shut up because i want to sleep. I suddenly saw a bright light. so bright that i couldn't open my eyes. I closed them tight thinking that it would be darker. but it got brighter when my room was so dark. Then I saw a man wearing suit in his back view. I started asking in my mind. who are you. who are you. who are you. are you good or evil? That man then turned around to his side view but it was so bright that i couldn't see his face. I could only see moustache on his chin, his eyes was so bright and i couldn't see. Then sombody shouted Jesus and he's gone. Then it became dark as usual. I tried looking for him again. but I can't find him anymore. My room became quiet again and i fell asleep.

I've decided to throw a mini party at 7th Haven on my birthday.

Please don't make it too big for me.

wahahahah.

Date: 19 June 2009, Friday

Time: 6pm - 8pm

Venue: Steamboat @ Bugis

Whoever can make it. you can come at 7. But you got to eat faster.

Time: 8pm - 3am

Venue: Kampong Bahru, 7th Haven

Approx: 20 people

If you can't make it for steamboat. Please make sure you make it for this.

Exclusively once a year for you to sabo me. To those people who got cream all over by me on/not on your birthday. I know you're waiting for this.

But still, although shyrlyn is brave, courageously and manly. Please be lenient on me.

You need to let me know how many of you are coming in order for me to make necessary preparations and resevations.

Who's invited?: Ashton, Alicia, Betty, Regina, Royston, Yikang, Tiffany, Chun Rong, Elyn(if you can make it), Yan Ming, Yi Xuan, Daniel, Winson, Eliz (mia so long alr, better come!), Julio

Char, Kexin, Queena, Seth Toh, Derek Lim, Andy LWL, Irene, Karen.

Those who names stated here, you make sure you make it ok!

If you think I've missed out your name, i give you permission to spam me, scold me. wahahah.

So please make yourself free that day. Also, if you want to ask your partner, your friend or whoever to come along, all are welcomed. But you have to let me know earlier. if not i can't make reservations.

Thanks greatly,

Shyrlyn